its almost here.

i survived.

the first big day.

now I'm on the days to follow.

starting with our "3 year" anniversary.

Tuesday, April 10th 2012 we will be an "official couple" for 3 whole years.

dangggg.

since we have been close friends since 2005 it doesn't seem like its ONLY been 3 years.

but thats still a long time.

my longest relationship.

i remember the day like it was yesterday. 

he was home from college on break.

Tuesday April 7th, 2009 i went to his parents house and we watched movies.

head over heels in love already.

then he went back to BG for 3 days to take exams.

so i got 3 days of cute sappy FB status and text messages.

came back on Friday April 10th.

didn't get home until almost 730 which was WAY later than he had planned.

i was still in high school at the time.

the plan was he was picking me up from school.

didn't happen.

so anyway.

i get all dressed up just like he asked.

he shows up with yellow roses/bouquet

in his black on black.

yummmm.

and we go to Bravo.

which then became our restaurant. delicious btw.

so were eating.

and he hands me a small box.

inside, 

a diamond necklace. 

i still wear it to this day.

now, it has been lost since then.

but replaced with an identical one.

anyway.

so then we go see Ghost of Girlfriends Past.

appropriate right? ha.

afterwards he drives me home in his awesome car (our tC) which i sold :(

and in the driveway he asks me to be his girlfriend. officially and kisses me for the first time.

whole life made.

so for our 1 and 2 year anniversaries we went to Newport to the aquarium. 

its our thing.

so now I'm at the decision making point.

do i go again this year?

take alexis and keep the tradition going?

or do i let that rest with him?

let that be "our thing"

i mean really, am i never going to go to the aquarium again?

idk i can def arrange that.

but do i want to do that to myself and alexis?

maybe i should go alone without alexis?

maybe i should do nothing all day?

who knows.

i have a couple days.

its been almost 9 months since I've heard his voice.

tomorrow will be 9 months since I've heard his voice.

July 4th he went into his coma.

and i never heard his voice again after that.

were at the beginning of the end.

another blog for another day.