I'm such a bad blogger. haha. the weekends are always tough to blog. i spend a lot of the weekend wishing joe was here. he loves the weekend. friday we went to KI. that was lame. but it was another thing to check off my list of things I've done without joe. i think i feel if i check off my list i will feel better, but its turning out to be the opposite. anyway. KI was lame. and cold. so we came home. i finally talked through how i feel with one of my high school friends. did she get it? nope. but it was nice to put the words out there. she was there in the hospital when joe died and there was a lot about the story she didn't know. so it was nice to inform her. i hate telling my story though. some people find it therapdic, i find it stressful. I can type it and not be connected to what I'm typing but when i have to talk about it, the words take me right back to that minute and i get lost in that day and i feel pain that is unrealistic. i don't even remember the pain being that bad the day it happened, i guess I've numbed myself out a little. which is how i like it. the day the numbness goes away, is the day everything falls apart.
last night we had a bonfire. me marissa and some of our good friends. it was really nice. i enjoy being chill with them. there were times i wished joe was there, but there were other times i felt him standing right behind me. i know he was there. i just wish i could have been cuddled up with him. bleh. annoying. anyway. today were off to church with Gaga & Pops, haven't seen pops in a long time! it is always nice to spend time with them. they are always so receptive to how I'm feeling and what I'm saying.
hope you all enjoy your weekend.
Akon- Party Animal
joe loved akon and he says this song is about him. haha. he thinks he is a party animal, which could be very true. haha. i am laughing right now thinking of you signing this baby. hahaha. your cute & your mine & i love you! :)
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